Meditation can help you to have a true spiritual relationship; living without ego and developing a natural, healthy and honest relationship using meditation to help get you there. Here’s how…
What are we really looking for in our relationships? Love, trust, and acceptance? We are such individual beings that it is extremely difficult to achieve this without obstacles getting in the way. So many times we experience battles and forces between two people that prevent this from happening smoothly. We all bring a side of us that can be obstinate and ungiving, this is the part that we aim to work on rather than projecting that the other person ought to work on themselves. That is their choice. Our choice is to find the best version of ourselves, and allow this to be the person who seeks the love of another. To achieve a spiritual relationship we must reach even further, even higher and this can provides even more challenges. What was generally the work of the gods; forgiving us our sins, delivering us from evil, unconditional love, as well as redemption and salvation, can not really be expected from a life partner. However so many people are on the path of spirituality and are keen to find someone with which to share it, as well as hope that they’re on the same page.
But is it possible to find a life partner whose positive and negative ways are spiritually compatible with our own? A first step towards this eventuality would be to recognise that our ego can be a huge obstacle and therefore a shift in attitude is necessary to be able to openly reach a spiritual relationship; to let go of the “I” and recognise that we cannot base life, and therefore love, on our own self interests.
The ego is a powerful character and one that does not lie low easily; it thrives on desire for personal satisfaction, gain, achievement and status and is continuously driven by these factors. To remove yourself from your ego is no mean feat and takes conscious and consistent effort. It is part of human nature, and in some ways instinctual, yet we are conditioned in ways that are not conducive to reaching a level of spirituality, and therefore these must be released in order to do so. There may only be moments when this can occur within a relationship, it may also seem impossible to achieve, but it is something to be worked on.
If we take a step back and recognise the attitude of children towards life and love, and that of a parent towards their child’s needs we can recognise an example of the egoless approach. This innocent and pure love is one which takes joy in the happiness of the other, over themselves. And above this it is a pure acceptance of the other person. When egos interfere with one another conflict arises and inevitably negative reactions between the two come in to play. So how do we balance ourselves to be able to find a way between being selfish and selfless?
It may sound odd when speaking of a relationship between two people, but it only takes one to create a spiritual relationship; you. The only way to truly make it work is to focus on your own thoughts and actions – how you treat the other person is all that is relevant. How spiritual are you towards that person you aim to have this relationship with? Are you acting out of love? Are you expecting nothing from them? Are your intentions pure and innocent? Are you able to accept yourself? Are you able to love yourself for what you are? Are you conscious without agenda?
So how do we reach such a state of wholeness and selflessness without agenda? It is often noted that in sleep we reach inner peace and contentment without effort, our agenda is inactive during slumber and so we are in a state of pure consciousness, yet we are not awake! Comparatively we can utilise the traditional methods of meditation to reach this plane, to find our agenda-free selves. Meditation can allow our minds to locate the place where, over time and continuous practice, ego becomes useless, a meaningless construct that we can set free and be free from. To be free from demand and need.
Back to relationship status, once you can free yourself from demanding from others, you can then relate to another being in the same way. They can then join you in your fulfilment. If you are complete as you are, this can be shared. To realise we do not need another to fulfil ourselves is the ultimate personal fulfilment. To get to this point is not going to happen overnight, we have as I mentioned at the start, become so conditioned to consider our self as the priority that it can be an extremely difficult concept to grasp let alone master. However, if your goal is to achieve a spiritual relationship then you’ll get on the path in your own way, experiencing moments where the selfish and selfless will conflict. You will have ups and downs, but the challenges you face will show you the parts of your ego that still need work. The ‘me’ will begin to back away, and your self-acceptance will grow. First you find that relationship with yourself, then you can truly share yourself with another.
To follow the traditional practices of meditation can be thoroughly rewarding in many ways, not just for relationship goals, but for inner peace and understanding of the self which then assist you in living a more positive and happy life, free from judgement and need, and more directed towards acceptance and completeness.
Distance Leaning Diploma Course in Meditation
To learn more on the art of meditation please take a look at this distance learning course offered by the School of Natural Heath Sciences. This Meditation course, takes the student on a journey through both Eastern and Western meditation techniques; from Chakra Balancing to Walking the Labyrinth. No previous qualifications are required, as this course covers the appropriate basics for those studying this subject for the first time.
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